Rainbows

Two posts in one night will surely not be my norm, but I think I should write something down as I think of it and tonight I seem to be "on". 

I mentioned signs before and during and after my daughter's death in my previous post.  And I talked about how many rainbows I have seen and how extraordinary they have been this year.  But something new just dawned on me. 

In April of last year, just two months before Michaela died, Bill and I went to Hawaii.  We had a wonderful trip.  It was neither of our first trip to Hawaii, but our first together and our first time to Maui. 

Hawaii is famous for rainbows.  Regular afternoon showers almost always result in rainbows.  On my previous 4 trips to Hawaii I saw rainbow after rainbow.  But on this trip, just months before my shining, rainbow loving daughter was to die we saw not one single rainbow.  In an entire week, with all of the normal afternoon showers and even in the mist of the waterfalls on Hana road, there were no rainbows.  We talked about it towards the end.  Bill had lived in Hawaii, he knew there should have been rainbows, but there was none.  I took over 1000 pictures on that trip.  You will not find a single rainbow. 

A sign?  Only for me, I'm sure, but no way for me to understand it.  I'm not that in tune with my universe.  Here's a few more small oddities....not once since Michaela died have I had a plan rained out.  We live in Florida.  It is supposed to rain every afternoon in the summer.  I haven't scheduled around the rain.  In fact sometimes I have watched the rain move all the way around us, as we bike or kayak or even just take a walk.  I've walked through wet ground and driven through rain and once or twice caught the sprinkles at the end or beginning of a storm, but I have not yet been 'rained out' regardless of the forecast.  I often wonder how long that will last and if I will be sad or relieved when it ends.